I wanted to approach the subject of what some people may call a “Birthing Coach.” Due to the recent joyous findings of my first born, due in June of this year, I wanted to talk a little about being a support system for my fiance.~
- Always Be Soft:
The birthing process from start to finish is a delicate situation that can change at any minute. In order to be a good support system for your partner be soft in your approach to her needs.
2. Always Be Open:
Always consider other ways of doing things. Sometimes there might be situations in which you only see one solution to a problem in regards to: comfort, pain, or mobility. It is your job as THE support team to have an open mind when dealing with these situations.
Yes! Seriously, it hurts! Take what your partner says to be serious. Even if the current situation doesn’t seem serious, or even real, take it as eminent anyway. For you will be far better off, in general, when taking things seriously rather than as nonsense. Furthermore, your partner’s body is going through things you can’t experience yourself. In this, you should take note of things, as they are normal for her, but may seem strange for you.
4. Health Conscience:
Keep a steady solid health conscientious mind. Meaning: If you can(in a soft way)suggest high caloric, rich nutrient based food, then do so. But, if your partner has a craving for sweets or breads, let her indulge. For ultimately, it wont kill the baby nor your partner to splurge every once in a while. As you want to strive for two things: Happy & Healthy.
5. Happiness at Every Turn:
Plucking from number 4, keep happiness in your sight at all times. If there is something that makes your partner happy, do it! This is one of the simplest things you can do in order to eliminate stress from your partner and your baby’s experience – by osmosis.
6. Coaching or Supporting?
I tend to go with the word support over coaching. This is because when one “coaches” something, he tends to have a particular amount of control over the situation. In birthing/pregnancy, you have anything BUT control. For your partner will, urinate when prompted, eat when prompted, and ultimately have your baby when prompted. So in a holistic form, you want to be her support. When referencing support, I mainly associated the word with how pillars act when holding up a beautiful building. In this case, you are those pillars, and your partner is that beautiful building.
7. Find Time for Quiet:
Whether you are in the midst of the birth or you are only half way through your first trimester; find time in your mind to find space. This will help you keep your emotions and mental state in check. For when your partner is under physical, mental, and emotional stress, there honestly isn’t a place for you to add to the stress. If you want to cry, cry afterwards – together. If you get scared, swallow it and move on. If your mind races, harness it. For this is a child of YOURS and it’s pertinent to the health and wellness to everyone in the room to keep a sane mind – even if doing so seems hard.
8. Break Things Up:
Take spontaneous trips to the Zoo, or something of that value, in order to break the minuteness, every day activities up into enjoyable times. Of course, if you are in the middle of having your baby don’t ask, “Hey honey, want to go to the Zoo?” But, you may want to keep ideas like this in your back pocket for after the baby is born. Taking yourselves out of your normal environment can really ease the mind. Think of it as a refresher button.
9. Stay Active:
In order for things to progress in a simple and fluid manner, keep yourself and your partner active(as much as is comfortable)during pregnancy and after the birth. This will keep your heads clear, body strong, and hearts contracting. This also directly relates to number 8: Breaking up the normal routine during pregnancy and after the birth. Going on long walks for instance can further connect you to your partner and baby while enjoying the fresh air.By: Thomas McGregor